People just like to make life for others difficult cause it’s always easier to see someone else whom you’re not close to to be in difficulties. Then it just spreads like a virus and soon it’s the norm and everyone accepts it and calls it life. Nowadays no one wants to get hurt and that it’s easier to push someone away than baring to them, then it’s deemed as you needing to resolve the problems on your own. Nowadays it’s so easy for people to be lazy, when some situation requires seriousness and a little vulnerability, it’s easier to just be vague or take it as a joke or to avoid it altogether. Where have I been? It’s like I am in a deep slumber of carefree-ness and routine in the past that I had suddenly snapped myself awake and having all these demons coming at me from every directions. The worst realisation that you woke up alone. I screamed and screamed till my throat is hoarse but no sound came out. I guess it’s a sign that I ought to just shut up, not to be alive but just living, to meet all my bodily needs and nothing beyond that. I hate it that I’m voiceless, even if a whisper is managed, silence would greet me like a cold, bleak wall. Why tell me something that I already knew? Or that in life things just have to be resolved on your own? Why can’t that belief be broken? Never was it tried to help others to just, move forward. Which is why we’re all stuck in the same position, voiceless and wallowing in self-pity that we’re all meant to resolve this on our own. And now I’m aching to just crawl back and hibernate into the deepest abyss possible and never come back.
